vseslavrus в посте Metapractice (оригинал в ЖЖ)
I mean really, who doesn’t want more wellbeing in their life? Who doesn’t want to live in more harmony? Who doesn’t want to have deeper, ongoing peace? Who doesn’t want to sleep more deeply, more restfully at night? You know? if any of those questions resonate for you, then... the ongoing practice is really well worth it.
And with this process it’s completely about following. It’s completely about... allowing and inviting and not about any kind of force. Any time we’re forcing, any time it feels difficult or effortful, we’re doing something else. That’s not this. It’s not this process.
And the interesting thing is that when we experience our self as a separate “I” in a small place, separate from the full consciousness that we actually are, there is inevitably this sense of, we have to run ourselves. We have to manage ourselves. We have to make ourselves do something. And when the “I” dissolves again as the wholeness of consciousness, there isn’t that separation.
It’s just presence. Now I am here as presence, experiencing... whatever I’m experiencing, doing... whatever I’m doing. I am here as presence, rather than a small, tight, separate place in space.
In spiritual traditions, in many spiritual traditions, there is... speaking philosophically about what we do when awakening happens or when enlightenment happens, there’s a merging of subject and object. The perceiver and perceived become one. But again, what does that mean? We can sit and philosophize about it and get all convinced we know it’s true, but we’re no better off, because... we’re just being mental. So, this is a very direct experience of that. So... the perceiver, the “I”, dissolves, relaxes, melts as Awareness. So now there’s Subject-... -Beingness integration, merging. No separation there. And then, sometimes that itself is enough so that now there’s automatically no separation now... with the Object, or the feeling. If I am aware of my feeling... the feeling is the object of the sentence. “I” is the subject. So when we get… And the feeling is what we’re perceiving, what we're perceiving... that’s the perceived.
So... to make sure that the integration is complete, we now invite... specifically the integration of... all of awareness to flow in and as the sensation of the area where we were dealing with. And then we have a kind of completeness, a kind of wholeness... which is why I call it the Wholeness Process. So there’s again this sense of... of... we are the Whole. There is not this inner division that is... creating separation, that makes our… ends up making our lives more difficult. Yes, Joseph.
Now I realize, that... what I wanted to do, before I felt something change that in me, it is... it is like... the activity and the “I” is the same thing, you know? So I have… I don’t have to push it, because we are the same...
Now, when we come in as babies, when we are born, babies...
I can’t say this for sure I guess, because I don’t actually remember what I experienced things like as a baby. But I’ve looked into the eyes of a lot of babies since, and our... our grandson, our little grandbaby, a couple of years ago, he was born, and... looking into his eyes… I’m sure all of you have looked into the eyes of a baby, and there’s that sense of this wide open presence that a baby… a baby just gazes back at us, that sense of wide open presence. And... my sense is that the baby is... is in this place of experiencing as the awareness. They’re experiencing just this wide-open awareness. There is no sense of an “I” for the baby. And developmental psychologists will tell you this, and spiritual teachers in their own way have a different version of this, but it’s pretty commonly understood that newborns don’t have a sense of an “I”. They don’t have a sense of a separate Self even. And this has its downsides. The upside is that the baby tends to have this lovely, wonderful presence that makes all of us enjoy just looking into the eyes of a newborn and a lot of people gravitate to babies for this reason and just adore looking and, ah…. It’s so peaceful looking into the eyes of a baby like this and it’s because they have the… they’re experiencing as this wide-open presence without a separate “I”. They don’t have a sense of an “I” developed yet.
Now, at the same time, when we… as a part of our development, when we form a sense of who we are, who knew that when we think “I”, and... what better way to think about our identity. We could come up with concepts for identity, but at a really fundamental, at the most basic, unconscious level, who we “believe” we are is this “I”. And isn't it interesting that for, essentially all of us, essentially universally, when we access the “I”, when we discover what it is, it’s almost universally, it’s small. It’s way smaller than the full consciousness that we actually have access to in any moment.
I’m going to ask a slightly strange question now, (but not so strange for those of you in NLP), and that is, “Where is the ‘I’ located?"
So, if you just sense, without thinking about it, without figuring it out, without... ...making logical sense out of it… If you just ask the question, “So I am aware…” Say that statement again to yourself, “I am aware of the sensation in my body….” This sensation, whatever sensation you picked. For me it was at the base of my spine. “I am aware of this sensation at the base of my spine.” So where is the “I” located? Where’s the one who notices?
So just let that awareness come into your mind, into... into your attention. It might be anywhere.
It could be in the head, it could be outside the head, it could be in the body; it could be outside the body. It could be... really anywhere.
If you weren’t able to find the location of an “I” for you, then just go, “Where is the perceiving happening from?” and just notice what location comes. And again, it’s going to be simplest if you take the first one. You could find more locations, but just go with the first one that comes to you. There’s no right or wrong. None is better or worse, even.
You can say already, “I am aware of this sensation in my body,” the one that we started with. So awareness is throughout the physical body, right?
And we can notice, if we pause, there’s awareness of the whole body. If something were to brush against your knee or your elbow right now, you would probably notice that and you would probably notice it without effort. It would just be an automatic, “Ah yeah, there’s that sensation of noticing that.” So the awareness... is throughout the body.
Now if we check a little further,we can recognize, if... I snap my finger here out to the left of myself, I hear that. The sound... I receive the sound, and again, I notice it without any effort.
I can perceive... sound there. No effort. Sound comes in. I’m aware of it. And if the sound happens to the right, same thing. And you can imagine this yourself too, at this moment, to just... experience this for yourself.
There’s the space out to the left, if there’s a sound there, you’ll notice it. Space out to the right, on the other side, if there’s a sound there, you’ll also notice that. And if there’s a sound behind you, you’ll notice that If there’s a sound in front, you’ll notice that. If there’s a sound above, there’s a natural automatic noticing of that. And if there’s a sound really anywhere, it’s just something you notice without effort.
So, you can pause to just register that for a moment. Because it’s having this experience of this...capacity to notice that really is what Awareness is…
And if we check, there’s really not an edge to it. So... I notice what’s out to the left. I can notice… if the sound happened really far out, it could be really very far out, if it was loud enough, I would hear that, it would just come in, I would experience it, it would happen without effort. So... this awareness is a sense of… it’s the capacity to notice that’s really all around, all around us in all directions, simultaneously and it’s throughout our bodies also.
Let’s start with a very simple sentence that we can all verify in this moment. So let’s take the sentence, “I am aware…” See when I do this with groups live, I usually say, “I am aware of the people in this room.”
If you just notice, tune in for a moment, to notice some body sensation. You could say right now, "I am aware of this body sensation,” correct? And you can all just take a moment to process that and notice... notice a sensation for yourself, and notice... that you’re aware of it.
That I am aware of this sensation. So for me right now I can say, “You know, I’m feeling just a little bit of tension at my lower back.” Just a little, subtle... pressure there. And I can say, “I am aware of this.”
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